My cousin, Lauren, is great about keeping up her blog. My stepmom, Lynn, is also. I just forget about it. Since I'm pregnant with Max's sibling, I thought I would try again. I know I will have some long nights ahead of me, so I might as well blog away! I'm on FB, Google+, and now Pinterest. Lauren posted all about 2011 and I keep thinking about our year last year. Unfortunately, my post will not be as light-hearted as hers.
2011 started off with a ton of snow! I was teaching third grade and definite about not returning in the fall. Having a busy husband and no family around caused me to make this decision, along with the fact that I felt like I was doing nothing well. I wasn't a great mom or teacher or wife. So, I left the classroom in June and amazed I made it to the end of the school year. In February, my principal died of lung cancer. This was just the beginning of several cancer deaths for us last year. He was a wonderful man and was always positive and encouraging. Max enjoyed being in school, but I definitely missed him with my mind on all my children even when I was at home. We traveled to Tampa in February to visit family there. My Aunt Pennie was fighting another bout of breast cancer, but it seemed this battle would not end well. We met my mom and Issi there and had a great time visiting.
In May, Stephanie and I went to NYC for a girls weekend. We had a wonderful time until Saturday. Lou's mom had hernia surgery on Thursday and was found unconscious Saturday morning. It was decided that she should be transferred to Yale where she would be closer to us and Lou could monitor her. In the ambulance, she coded and never recovered brain function. I was incredibly sad for Lou. I was also sad for the relationship we never had. I know of friends who have wonderful relationships with their in-laws. We never had that. Lou took some time off of work and was by her side daily. It was a very trying emotional time. We moved her to New Haven in June where we could visit. Lou and I differed on end of life choices, which caused more stress in our lives.
In June, my friend, mentor, and boss died of breast cancer. Chris was in her mid-60s and led an amazing life. Max's bris was at her house. She was a straight-shooter and was incredibly giving and honest. I only hope I can be more like her. She's the founder of New Haven Reads. We had many talks while she was sick in the hospital and at her home. The last time I saw her, in early June, it was a rainy day and I had Max with me. I almost cancelled for no reason other than the fact that it was gross out. I'm so glad that I didn't. She was on oxygen, but we were still laughing and joking. I took off Max's shoes and out poured a ton of sand. I told her I was sorry and she just shrugged her shoulders and said, "No big deal, we can vacuum!" In true Chris fashion, there was no funeral. They held a memorial service in September that was quite lovely. I think of her when I'm at New Haven Reads. I think of her when I need some light-hearted parenting advice. I think of her when a book falls off the shelf at NHR or a child is excited about getting a word right. She's always there.
The summer was uneventful after that. My grandmother turned 94 and is still rather funny. Max and I did our annual tour of TN. In September, Pennie took a turn for the worse and we knew she was not long for this life. She spent her final days in her home surrounded by her awesome sons and her siblings. Max and I went to Florida and saw Pennie unconscious and I was able to say goodbye. While I was very sad and emotional, it was so lovely to be able to say goodbye and have time with family. Max was fabulous at cheering us up. Pennie played such a profound part in my growing up. She lived less than a mile away from my childhood home for many years and I woud see her and her children daily or weekly. I know from my mom, her good friend (despite being my dad's sister), that she gave my mom parenting advice. When Max was born, Pennie and David came to his bris. Pennie stayed with us the night before his bris. Max woke up several times, I fed him a few times and Pennie just got up with him at 5:30 and let us sleep. She was just that way. So often something funny happens or Max says something witty and I want to call her. As my dad tells my grandmother, "I don't think she has a phone where she is..."
October brought our first big snow that was forecasted to fall while Max and I were in Vermont with Rachel and Tristan. We left early, but the snow started pouring in Massachusetts. It was pretty brutal driving. We made it to Hartford and stayed! I thought it was going to be an awful winter, but it's been rather pleasant thus far.
November was great with my mom and Issi coming for Thanksgiving. Jenna, my stepsister, came down for the day also. We had a great turkey, stuffing, and a few sides. It was really nice to just have family at home and not be traveling.
In December, we all went to NY to celebrate Katie's bat mitzvah. What a weekend! Keith and Ellen really did a marvelous job! We had a wonderful time and the food was amazing. The morning my mom and Issi were supposed to leave the phone rang. It was The Mary Wade Home, where Lou's mom lived. She had passed away in her sleep. It didn't seem real to me until I saw her in the casket. She looked like her old self. Great hair, painted nails and proud stance. That's the way I will remember her, not as the patient semi-conscious. Lou's niece, Ashely spoke at the funeral about "The Nana I knew". It was such a fitting tribute to her memory of her relationship with her nana. This is the way I want to remember all of those who I know who died--the __________ I knew.
At the end of 2011, Max had the stomach flu, then I got it. My friend said it was an end-of-the year cleanse. I know that 2012 will be a better year. 2011 was brutal. Our new baby is due July 1 and we find out where we're moving to in June 2013. So far, so good.
